Sinbad's guide to life

My friend Oprah Winfrey, on her TV show, has called me "the funniest man on the planet." That was kind of embarrassing - but if Oprah wants to think I'm funny, who am I to argue? My mother say I'm brilliant. Well, I am her son, so she might not be objective - but since she knows me better than anyone, it must be true. Don't ask me. All I can say for sure is that I'm a 6'5" black comedian with red hair and a high butt who has walked a mile in every man's shoes. What I. mean is, I've lived large and fallen hard - lost every job I've ever had, messed up everybody I've ever dated, been kicked out of every institution I've ever been in, including marriage - and I've survived. That's how I know everything. Why, you could steal five or six books and not find as much help as I will give you.