The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts by Gary Chapman | Summary & Analysis

The Five Love Languages is a popular book by Gary Chapman. It outlines five ways to express and experience love that Chapman calls "love languages": gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service (devotion), and physical touch (intimacy). Chapman's book claims that the list of five love languages is exhaustive. Chapman argues that, emotionally, people need to receive love and uses the metaphor of a 'love tank' to explain peoples' need to be loved. He also writes that people should not use the love languages that they like the most but rather the love languages that their loved ones can receive. Each person has one primary and one secondary love language. Chapman suggests that to discover a love language, one must observe the way they express love to others, analyze what they complain about most often, and what they request from their significant other most often. People tend to naturally give love in the way that they prefer to receive love. It is also possible to find another person's love language by asking those same questions. Chapman suggests that peoples' love languages do not change over time, but instead develop and need to be nurtured in different ways.